The Remedy on Christmas Day

The remedy is the experience 
This is the dangerous liaison
The comedy is that it's serious
This is a strange enough new play on words
I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend
The rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the light on all of your friends
Well it all amounts to nothing in the end

Leave it to my man Jason Mraz, to make the complicated seem very simple. Merry Christmas everyone! :)

Sundays, Coffee and my Family Tree

Having more than one set of family in a lifetime is not surprising to me at all.
I have considered friends being the next best and closest thing to whom I can consider as family.

Why?

Well, they listen to your rants - the cursive, vulgar, no-holds barred kind of ranting which your Mother and Father wouldn't typically approve of and letting your parents hear 'em is a surefire guarantee of either a good smack in the head or worse, a vocal fight.

You get to share more of the "behind the scene" stories with your friends. Considering the fact that you are of almost the same age, it makes opening up less humiliating, and more accepting. 

Your friends do not - in as much as they would want to - impose larger than life rules which your own biological family would. Don't take me the wrong way. My friends are not BIs. It's just that, they try to understand where you're coming from and would rather want to hear you confide with them and them sharing pieces of advise to you than ostracize you with generalities which is truly, not solicited at that particular moment.

Lastly, friends are another source of ultimate happiness. Knowing that you are able to share a huge chunk of your life with them makes you wonder, just how amazing it is to belong with these set of people, despite being entirely different, and yet, you just feel like you guys were once cut out from the same cloth. No judgment, no inuendos. All you have to bring to the table is an understanding and accepting heart. That, my friends, is what I call MIRACLE!

And having bestowed with such miracle, I have spent yet another amazing Sunday with two of my closest buddies: Patty and Jing². These two are my complete allies with just about anything : food, fashion, pranks, humor, smart gossiping, and family. We have come a long way since 2010. One amazing quality that I really admire from these two is their passion when it comes to friendship. You would rarely see true sympathy and love coming from adults these days, but Patty and Jing have proven me wrong. And that sometimes, scary as it seems to trust others with your life, I wouldn't mind entrusting mine to theirs. They're just God's gift to me. 

 I am looking forward to many more brekkys, Sundays, coffees and seasons with you two ♥

And, what better way to spend another Sunday than an early Christmas treat !!!  We hanged out and sipped to amazing coffees at Starbucks IT park. Jing had dark cherry mocha, Patty wanted hers on the more fruity side with strawberry and cream while yours truly, opted the ever reliable hot white chocolate mocha. We had these three all in venti. (That perky Starbucks cashier got us into venti while mimicking the latest Miss Universe pose. Yes. He is gay! :D) 

Well, just let these photos give you a dose as to what went on that day, the giving of gifts, our happy lots, the sumptuous meal we had at Max's thereafter and .. :)

And here is a closer look at the amazing gifts that I got from my family tree:

Tonic's Emma bag in aztec print - gifted from Jing²

 Toto - my cable wire holder gifted from Patty

 and lastly, a shot of the nude blazer and floral, green-hued kimono both gifted from Patty

Upon opening my gifts, I suddenly felt like I was 10 years old all over again. Thank you guys.. I never expected to have these babies for Christmas..!!! And on a more deeper note, thank you for letting me be a part of your lives as well.. ♥ To more Christmases and seasons in between Family Tree!!! much love ♥♥♥

raging hormones

It's Thursday and Day 2 post-Pablo..

After conquering the aftermath of what could have been considered as a typhoon stronger than Bagyong Sendong, the persistent cool winds and drizzles still frequented the Metropolitan's night sky. Our site is currently on dress down, to accomodate the not so graceful commutes of their employees. Good job to its management! :)

Anyway,  I have been feeling bloated. big. dreary. stressed. the list goes on.
I guess, it is that time of the month again wherein my gastronomical wants are ridiculously horrible and I weigh (I don't really weigh.. hehehe! ) and look 2x than I should.
And since I still am a human being who needs to go to work, I opted in wearing these aztec pants, paired with taupe cami and nude crocheted top.
Comfort and style was my peg for today. 
Pretty basic and laid back for a night's worth of work.

Oh! This is my first outfit post by the way.  ♥

 crocheted top - Forever21 || taupe colored cami - Forever21 || aztec printed pants - Nowi Onlineshop || bangle - from Boracay || candy colored wrap - carbon find || turquoise bib necklace - gift from Patty

The heart of a Rock Star

I have come to know a lot of men lately - some as refined and dreamy as Christian Grey that you would not assume he could do vanilla with anyone, or as broodingly temperamental as Travis Maddox who tends to snap every now and then but with the softest heart for his Pigeon, or as secretively seductive and beautiful as Giddeon Cross who can definitely turn your world upside down. These men, of course, despite being the "perfect" guy that they are, held a lot more than just good looks and an incredible history of seducing women. They all held a secret. And that secret, is what made them humanly tangible in all aspects. I have read their stories, and I swear, I have swooned and gushed over how capable of romance a broken man can be.

Then, I came across a rock star by the name of Kellan Kyle. His story was very typical: a too-hot-to-handle moody artist with an almost-there-fame, frontman and lead singer of his band (the D-Bags), is bestfriend with this guy Denny, and was involved in a love triangle. I would never have wanted to read this series but I needed to since I was feeling the depression of not being able to read any good material lately. LOL.  

To my surprise, the story was beyond any of my expectations. 

Others said the story was dragging, but I never felt like it dragged me. I thought of it as very explicit, the author clearly describing how the heroine - Keira Allen, felt. The series brought me to a kaleidoscope of emotional struggle : love, lust, guilt, desire, confusion, anger, jealousy and even bravery. I could not withstand not finishing Thoughtless and moving on to its sequel, Effortless, that I endured sleepless nights during my days off. But it was worth it, since the plot just got better and better. And as if I have not surprised myself enough, for the first time since I have been hooked to reading Erotic/Romantic/New Adult genre novels, I cried. 

Yes, I cried.

And before you get to conclude how much of a sappy person I am, read this note that Kellan hid for Keira, the very culprit of my outburst:

 The note spoke volumes to me. Asking for someone not to give up on you seemed to have hit close to home more likely than the cheating and falling out of love part. Then did I realize being in a relationship is not all about the romance, nor love per se. It is also about having faith. 

Now, I have read this series twice. And each time I come across this part, I can't help but cry. And to me, that is as good as giving this novel a 5-star rating. It moved me. It helped me understand that cheating will never be okay. But to some extent, if the person we loved fell for someone else, then, let that person go. We should try to dismiss feeling responsible for the loss we never intended to happen in the same manner that we should not stay in a relationship just because it is "conveniently safe". As how Denny said it to Keira,


“I think in the end, you would have stayed with me, out of obligation...or maybe comfort. Maybe I was safe to you, and you needed to feel that. I know how scared you get of the unknown. To you...I must be kind of a security blanket. Do you see now, how that doesn't work for me? I don't want to be there, simply because the idea of me being gone is too...scary. I want to be someone's everything. I want fire and passion, and love that's returned, equally. I want to be someone's heart... Even if it means breaking my own.”


I can't wait to read Reckless, the third installment to SC Stephens beautiful TL series. I don't really know what to expect, since these couple are nowhere near predictable. But I hope the final hoorah won't end up breaking my own heart. LOL.

Oh! I came across this music video by Jessie McCartney. His style is very Kellan Kyle-ish with just the basic white top, almost fitted jeans, leather wristband and the perfect song to boot that clearly explains the struggle my favorite rock star had to endure while loving someone from a distance.

There may have been a roster of possible Kellan Kyles out there. I've seen other blogs and fans posting pics as to who could be IT for them. As for me, I am keeping my imagination run as wild as it could. He is just too good to be personified. Not one male probability can stand a candle next to how I have envisioned him in my head.

 On a more personal note, I will forever love you Kellan Kyle. Complicated as you are, but you are definitely worth the time and tears. ♥

Pixlr.com

Okay.. I may be a little behind with photo blogging.
And clearly, I am not that good with photo editing.


But I got to play around with the various tools from www.pixlr.com and after a thorough selection of app, I just fell in love with its Vintage effect.
Take a look :

 This is my personal Birthday Collage aptly titled: " Bogart's favorite B's"
- Bohemian
- Blueberry Cheesecake
- Bib Necklace
- Breakfast

Why Bogart? 
That would be my alter-ego's name: someone who does not mind bumming around and spending an eternity's worth of chillaxing and idle time. 

Next up:

 
 
 Yeap! It might take quite a while before we get to have another one of this in the future. But nonetheless, I wouldn't mind doing a repeat. :)

And lastly:

 I just want to make a shout out to the coolest person that has ever graced Mandaue City : ME! lol. But seriously, this just looks well put together despite the display of canned goods and other dried items in the back. And a Kudos to have pulled off a Jason Mraz feminine version with this look.


♥

27th ♥

Dear 27 year old Me,

First of all, Happy Birthday to you! 
You have earned yet another year to either screw up or make it! 
But in all honesty, I really couldn't care less which of the 2 you do. Because either way, you always come out better and stronger. 

I know you sometimes question yourself if you are ever worthy of the love and affection that both your family and peers are showing you. You think the worst of yourself sometimes. You are scared to come real close to anyone thinking that you may never get appreciated. You love the spotlight - but only for a good 3 minutes and you wish the world would just cave in and swallow you whole because having more than 3 minutes of their attention makes you feel barenaked. You are a mixture of fire and ice, an almost perfect combination of passion and nonchalance. Yet despite your uncertainties, you still get to see the good side of everyone - even to those who have deserted and pained you. You have learned to let go, to sail away and pirouhette with your everyday dreams thinking that life is never a bed of roses, but a road that must be travelled with arms wide open! You value Thank You's and I'm Sorry's. You hold on to promises. You believe in happily ever after. And you love despite being hurt. You simply don't give up.

It may take longer for everything to come into place. It may still take time for you to come around certain things and certain people. And that's okay. 

Never let a single frustration hold you back. You know better than to be bullied by the different degrees of absurdities that might be thrown your way. You are a vision. Be that vision. Always remember that you get to live your life just once. And the best things in life don't have repeats. So live while you're in it. Embrace the odds and appreciate the good! You are more than what you think. Be your own shining star! And always remember that I love you. Not because I know you, but because I am you. 

Tea, Sex and Sympathy

And she began with a.. "Never let your man see your vulnerability".

Maria, not her real name, is a married woman and a mom of 2. She is very typical - petite, with extra flabs here and there, not too flashy, someone you would not notice not until you see the color of her ID badge which clearly speaks who she is and what she does. But don't be fooled. This woman is a force to be reckon with. And despite all that, she has had her share of infidelity. 

She was at her prime when her husband made the infamous detour. She knew it was more than just simple exchange of ILY's or sweet text messages. She knew the fling has turned into an affair. She was headstrong, prepping herself for the worst and reminding herself that she will overcome the turmoil. "Fake it 'til you make it" was her mantra. And she knew that because of what happened, things will inevitably change. 

I asked her how she got over that point and managed to stay with her husband. She simply explained,

.." when you're married, you don't get to decide between black or white. You have to consider the many rights your man made in comparison to the one wrong he has committed.."

I nodded. But I was never convinced. 

That simple conversation over breakfast opened a lot of queries in my mind. 
Is one to succumb to that mentality just because that person happens to be married? Is marriage a step to a lifetime of bliss or a cover up from our delusioned minds over love and relationships? Personally, it just felt wrong in so many levels. 

Manhattan, New York

I have never been to US - but seeing TV series, movies and even novels adapting its plot within the amped up lifestyle of Manhattan, makes one think: How is it to live the New York way?

Here is my take to that question - fashion!

I've put up these pieces through polyvore.com about a year ago. And while checking saved photos in my pc, I thought of sharing these through blogging. Not really much but I wouldn't mind bustling the streets with these lot. It's both fashionable, wearable and functional. And they're aptly named:

[1] Black.. And then some

[2]  Everyday Hue

[3] The Blinged and The Glamorous

One can always dream. Hope to meet you in person Manhattan :)

A E D E

I came across this song. It's a single from Matt Nathanson - the same guy who made a huge hit with this other song entitled "Come on Get Higher". I just can't seem to take off this silly grin plastered on my face whenever I get to hear this song. Although there is this certain level of ambiguity injected within the lyrics, but it definitely makes me all giddy and nostalgic. *swoon*


The guitar tabs are easy to learn. (By the way, I am putting this "I will own a guitar" mental ad on print so as to remind me that THIS should be envisioned by next year. A sturdy reminder). And I imagine cozy backyards, wooden chairs, piles of soiled plates, chilled drinks, breezy Saturday afternoon and cool friends to cap off the scene. 

Good vibes.. good vibes.. :)

Breathe. Free. Live

It was like LIVING for the first time.

I woke up, felt really, REALLY good, smiled and sighed. Whew! 
I have realized then just how much I have missed this feeling.

I got apprehensive knowing it may be fleeting.
So, I dared not to own it.
I double-thought about it.
I tried not to mind it.

Yet 2 weeks has passed and I am still feeling the intense calmness. So it got me thinking, perhaps this is for real? And knowing just how much I have wanted an ounce of peace subdue my mind and heart, it was a relief!

So I claimed it.I owned it.
I savored every moment of it.

Then exhaled.
I see things differently now.

Sometimes, what you think is the BEST may just be the best thing to lose at the moment. Not because you never cared, nor loved, but that was just as far as your heart can go. Stopping and letting go is the best therapy to get back at the things that truly matters the most - YOU!

And whenever I get glimpses of the past, I don't feel that sad anymore. 
They were made.They were lived. And I couldn't be happier, because I loved and I learned.

my kind of phone (Blackberry Curve 9220)

I don't really need a lot of blings - nor the whole shibang when it comes to gadgets. I want my things simple. 

Comfort and functionality is what I am after. 

I work at a BPO and at the same time, I am manning my own growing online shop.  To some, it may seem like living dual lives - fun, active, always on the go,  but when you get to live one, it's never a bed of roses. When everyone else are chilling and about to sleep, that's when you need to work. I could not even set up meetups with my beloved clients during nights because I have work. I can't even scour new items, choose fabrics and lavish in what I call "me time" because I need to rush. But this isn't me complaining. Umm..maybe a little. lol. Oh well. So what better way to remedy this dilemma? Technology. 

I need something that I can work with within my own pace, a gadget that promises longer battery life for those much needed phone calls, wi-fi ready so I can check mails and orders anytime I'd want, bigger memory space to store up messages from colleagues and clients alike, good camera quality for those much needed samplers for my next batch of clothes to sell, an MP3 player with good music quality and an organizer. It's that simple. Now, thanks to Blackberry Curve 9220, life is made simpler as it should be. I feel like this was made for people like me! Plus, it has qwerty keypad which makes texting and browsing easier in comparison to moving apps via touch.

Oh! If you're wondering how it looks like since almost all Blackberry phones - if I'm not mistaken,  look alike, take a look at the pic below:

Cool eh? :)

the little things

I've been thinking a lot lately. Wondered what are the things that would make me happy.

Well, mine are pretty simple. 

1. guitar

I swore when I was kid, my definition of success was getting on a stage, wearing nothing but a white tank top, faded jeans, used sneakers, rockin' guitar and a bad-ass attitude! And I'm going to sing my heart out and I would not give a care in the world!

2. sewing machine


I am no dressmaker. But I would love to be one. How cool could that be, that instead of purchasing goodies from the mall, you get to create your own stuffs, strut them and possibly sell 'em?

3. mannequin


And in lieu to my second happy goody, is a mannequin! I've always wanted to have one. I can't really elaborate as to why this makes me happy but seeing a fabric torso mannequin simply makes me go *sigh*. I'm all for anything vintage. Plus, it would be fun to have this baby around during photoshoots. Reliable proxy when I get all weary from dressing up and modeling clothes.

 
4. crayons


The smell of newly bought crayons brings me back to that certain place in my not so distant past wherein everything was within an arm's reach. When all you needed to do was pass your reports on time, ace quizzes and have fun while doing those. Also, this was my go 2 item when I was kid. If i happened to lose a pencil during class, what better way to resolve that dilemma than to use a black crayon as as my means of writing. lol

5. colored post its - tons of it


Not that I needed reminding, but I love the feel of getting all organized. That instead of thinking and cramming about what to do next, your post its are actually doing it for you. I mean, it would be a fantastic way to allow our brain to simply glide through things without really getting all worn up about planning and everything. 




And oh! This might be a little to early for a post about Christmas gifts but since we're on the "what makes you happy" note, I would just like to share these 2 gifts I wouldn't mind getting this Christmas:

a duster dress and toiletries!!! I have just realized that I don't have much of duster dresses at home and I end up rummaging my mother's closet for it. Furthermore, one of the things that I've been wanting to have is splurge myself to a once in a lifetime dream toiletry extravaganza. lol. What can I say, I am one hell of a weirdo! :)

PBB and its blahs

I could not have come up with a better title. lol. Needless to say, this "reality" TV show of ABS CBN has become a part of my early adulthood. There's really nothing more to it. It's about a bunch of individuals who is out there trying to prove themselves. Personally, it would be really hard to prove your very self when you're stuck inside an air conditioned, well-lit, well-guarded house and your life is televised 24/7. If you want to discover the real you, then don't audition to PBB. It's too predictable - you would either end up becoming the next fad of TVCs, magazine spreads or the next KIM CHIU of Philippine TV. Or better yet, just a plain ex housemate which, in all fairness, is probably the best title anyone should gain after entering that show.

So last night was the big event. 5 teens all in all have represented this generation's young as they settled in their respective places :
4th place: Jai and Joj (the twins)
3rd place: Roy 
2nd place: Karen
1st place: Myrtle

I couldn't be happier. Not because I am a huge fan of Myrtle, but the very fact that probably, the media and even the Pinoys have deviated from the usual : not voting goody goody two-shoes underdogs (the twins) and typical Cinderella male version (Roy). It would have been a disaster if either of the two won the grand title. I mean, come on! How could you stand being around people who are eternally screaming their lungs out every now and then at the shallowest of shallow stuff their is, and please.. TV shows were not made to equate poverty with pity. How demeaning could that be? If you win a contest, it should derive from the fact that you are marketable, effective and bankable when being the "latest PBB winner" soon loses its luster. It's about longevity my friend - or the capability of achieving that.

So was it a happy ending? To the winners, YES! Imagine the cash and the gadgets they've got. I couldn't really say it was a good season. But I'm glad, people are smarter these days :)

About yourself

Have you encountered this section in almost all social networking sites? 


"About yourself"


What does that even mean?


In a jiffy, I would simply put in their my demographics: age, gender, educational background, or if in need of some "muchness" (as what The Hatter from Alice in Wonderland would say), I would squeeze in some hobbies.


But what is it really?


Truth be told, it would've been easier to analyze someone else's work, someone's else's life and someone else's story. Because it is not YOUR story. Objectivity offers a more distant, non-personal, less biased and in depth conclusion to another living or non living thing. However, how else should we know who the real us or me in this matter, if not, ME?


Sigh. Well, I do know that I have got a really strong personality. I find it hard sometimes to deal with others. And on the get-go, I would never be counted nor recognized as the "Miss Congeniality" type. I always have this wall put up. I talk a lot - however, with sense. I abhor injustice and favoritism especially if it does not mesh well with my own personal plans. hehehe! And just recently, I found myself weak and shaken. Well..


But what I also do know about me, is I am an optimist. a forever hopeful. a hopeless romantic. a true and loyal friend. a loving daughter. an artist in my own light. 


Having said all these, would this over-do what the "About Yourself" section is requiring? or would I run out of characters to type in because I know me all too well? hehehehe...

2 steps forward, 1 look backwards

It's funny how you couldn't seem to move on with each day not having the usual routine in your life. You would think, "Damn! I am loving this part right here. I wouldn't mind getting the same dose each and every day". But in a split second, everything changes.


Just like in relationships. It's an all-consuming, stress-driven, love-sickening routine that's being served to you everyday. No matter how blatantly looking each dish is, you simply take in each bit without complaining. Or in my case, even if I do, but I would still suck in huge gulps just to satiate my emotional needs. Or so I thought. 


However, having realized that sometimes getting a variety is necessary. Or in my case, getting away from the routine was important as getting an extra liter of oxygen tapped into my system just to keep me going through the next 10-30 years of my life.


Lesson learned? Change is always good - if you choose to become a better person. Sacrifices must be made. But be cautious as to who and what should be sacrificed. Sometimes it's a one-way ticket. You don't get refunds once the purchase has been made.
It kinda sounds like making a bargain to the devil. lol

down with the syndrome

I abhor getting sick. Yes, I get a leave from work but I don't get to do anything THAT much. On top of that, I wanted my first photo blog to be something on the amped up side. Oh well...


Health is definitely our wealth. And in order to stay on top of your game, we need to take real extra care of ourselves. On a more personal note, I need to minimize on sweets and coffee. And getting extra extra rest. :)


Hope everyone is well. :)

never thought good things will happen

You know that saying "love is like a thief in the night"? 

What an odd comparison right? Knowing that a thief is an uninvited guest who literally trespasses the privacy of anyone's abode and end up stealing goods, or, when seriously provoked, might end up killing an entire household with either a hand gun, a knife or simply by strangling them one at a time. Baa! That was pretty grim of me. Well, before you go flip this page and wonder how dark my thoughts are right now, this blog post simply has nothing to do with a thief..nor with love.. So what's this blabber has in store for today? Some really good news. :) 

I was simply taken aback when my Team Lead awarded me as the 2nd performer within our team. I know, I know. Some of you would think, "The hell I care!" and believe it or not, that's exactly how my mentality was regarding all these crappy recognition and stuff. Well, it was not really announced to the entire account. Nor were there monetary prizes. (I got GOYA fruits and nuts as a reward though..teehee!) The thing was, I never really expected it to happen. The account that I work for is so huge with accuracy. And it's pretty damn hard to be ALL that sure and correct almost all the time. One stroke of wrong information is a surefire guarantee of you failing your scorecard. Imagine the stress. But hey! I took that negativity aside and took work as simply.. work! So that news jumpstarted my day..

Then, on my way home, I decided to take a long walk again with my earphones on and simply admiring the beauty of the sun. Not all of us gets to see the sun literally peek from the clouds and see it rise. And the heat is super comfortable. No wonder bikers, hikers or runners would prefer doing their stuff early dawn. No UV-ray fear or what. hehehe! After that, I ate a hearty breakfast with my two most favorite persons in the world: Mama and Papa. Then I did some laundry and checked the world's famous social networking site: Facebook. hehehe!

There went another surprise! My barkada of 13 years went online and her first greeting was "Wi uli ko dha cbu nextwk hehehe" 

It was as if I had a premature ventricular contraction.. or in lay man's term "my heart skipped a beat" kind of stuff. I haven't seen her in what felt like ages. I was so full of joy that I chatted with my other kabarkada and had her on the whole thing. :) :) This kind of stuff does not happen very often. Therefore, Saturday next week is the day to look forward. And oh! I will be seeing my goddaughter for the first time - cudieeee Lora.

Sigh. God is good. Considering everything that has happened, I think summer is finally here! And if summer were a thief in the night, by all means, KILL ME! :):)

step one

Gosh! What a relief to have finally made it to blogspot. And I now have my own URL, layout..whew! (i know..i know..it's so basic for an adult like me) but hey! I managed to put up my picture, add some extra here and there without having someone else's hands maneuvering the keyboard and the mouse. I deserve a pat at the back.


Anyway, true to my header's statement, others are born with a machine gun mouth that can rattle 300-500 words in less than 5minutes. While others, though meek and silent, can shake up any babbler out there with their super-sayan blog posts! Others too, can both talk and write very well. Hmm..so which category do I belong? That, my friend, is something I need to discover. Thus, step one!